Nathan and Lisa's Adoption Journal

Back to the Scene of the Crime

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Sat, 07 Jul 2007 04:00:00 GMT

USCIS Office—Fourth time. Cameron, our five-year-old, is now pointing out the landmarks as we pass the oh-so-familiar-territory of downtown Cleveland. It reminds me of that Chevy Chase scene: “Look kids…Big Ben…Parliament”. Only for us it is “Look Mom…Lake Erie…Key Bank”. But this time, we had our goods in tow: Princess Eliana. It was hard not to thumb our noses at the Disgruntled Government Workers who get paid peanuts to press our fingers onto a small glass surface. “Neener neener neener, you may have dragged us to this building three separate times but pppppphhhhhbbbbttt we have a darling little girl who made the red tape all worth it.” But alas, we just put on our Uber Friendly Personalities because those people carry weapons and we don’t.

On to more important things: Here is the Princess, looking decidedly happy about the whole business:

Eliana is becoming quite the Ham. And I’m not just talking about her Ham Hock legs, either. The other day at the grocery store, I had stepped away from the cart and when I returned—I’m not kidding—there was a circle of people surrounding her. She was smiling and clapping and waving her arms—putting on a great show for her fans. I always knew if we wanted an extrovert in this family, we’d have to adopt one. What a hoot.

She has started scooting. You would think we’d never seen a baby scoot before, but since we have waited So Long for Mobility, we are all Hoots and Hollers over her accomplishment. No wonder she likes to clap as much as she does.

Now back to Cleveland. “Why in the honky-tonk were you getting fingerprinted for a FOURTH time?” I hear you asking. Well, we are out of the starting blocks with our next adoption, this time from Taiwan. We knew a few years back that if we were going to adopt once, we were going to adopt twice. It seems only fair to Eliana that she have a pal to go through therapy with once they’re both adults. Though the process and country are a bit different, the wait is still the same. You can rest assured that there is more moaning and groaning and dorky pictures ahead. Stay tuned for the adventure!

[In case you missed our first three trips to Cleveland, type 'USCIS' in the search box to the left to read the ridiculous stories.]

Giggles and Grins

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Sun, 20 May 2007 05:00:00 GMT

Eliana had her first ride on a swing last night. She loved it. Loved it!!! I was so delighted to experience this first with her. She giggled and giggled and giggled. These pictures say it all!

Listen to Her Heart

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Sun, 20 May 2007 05:00:00 GMT

It’s taken a while for the Princess to feel like “mine”, and I’m sure if she could say something besides “bbbffffffftttt” and “da-da-da-da”, she’d say the same about me. Since the get go, I have done all kinds of motherly functions yet didn’t feel motherly. I define motherhood as the ability to enjoy kissing and snuggling up with a child, no matter how good or bad they smell. You see, all kids have a certain stink, and other people’s kids stink more than your own. That’s just the way it is. But about two or three weeks ago, I was changing a nappy with all its assorted odors and without being robotic about it—I leaned down and smooched my girl right in her neck. And it was right then that I realized “Hey! I kissed her just like I kiss the boys…automatically and with no mind to the slime and stink.” It was then that I knew she was mine.

Sweet Eliana is trekking right along with me in this journey called “family”. Though she doesn’t say “Mama”, I hear it in her heart. She’s glad to see me, cries when I’m out of sight, and just seems settled with the one she will one day call “Mom”. Safe, secure, and loved.

Birthday Girl

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Sun, 20 May 2007 04:00:00 GMT

It’s a shock to the system to celebrate a one year birthday when Sister Susie Sittin’ on a Thistle has been home with us just three months. Not to make this post a downer, but I spent about a week grieving and grumping over the eight (plus nine pregnant) months I didn’t have with my little girl. From one perspective, we are fortunate to have adopted her at such a young age, and yet what I also grieve is that I do not know the “story” that makes birthdays special…no pregnancy tales, no agonizing labor details, no knowledge of her first family (“Doesn’t she look just like Aunt Maude?”), and the particulars on why she is now with our family and not still in China.

But enough boo-hooing and back to Sister Susie. No, she hasn’t lost her two front teeth, but they have come in. She loved her birthday cake in the shape of a crown (of course!), and though she didn’t feed herself, she did take a quick liking to the sugar and frosting and ice cream and mmmmm, mmmmm, good!

Happy 1^st Birthday, Princess Eliana!

"Birthday Girl"

One of Mommy's Favorites!

Crown Cake - Just perfect for the princess

"Thank you Birthday Bunny, Mmm, Mmm!"

Mother's Day

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Sun, 13 May 2007 05:00:00 GMT

Some days—like Mother’s Day—where the King of the House goes to the trouble of reheating leftovers for lunch, I actually have a minute to kick back and see my children for the treasures they really are. They are the ones who got me into this motherhood business anyway. Sure, they’ve taken over my home (car, life) but they’ve also invaded my heart. You can’t find a prouder mama around, and this Mother’s Day I know something else to be true: It doesn’t matter whether their belly button was once attached to me or not—I love them all the same.

“You fill my cup until it overflows” (Psalm 23:5). Enjoy the pictures!

The Hen and Her Chicks

Obligitory Kissy Kissy

Why it Takes 178 Pictures to Get 1 Good One

Princess Eliana (on Queen Mother's Lap)

Free housecleaning every week?!? A massage every month??!?
(Or maybe just a notepad)

Gotcha + 3

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Sat, 05 May 2007 05:00:00 GMT

Three months ago today, we met our little girl. Already it feels as if she’s always been here. Was it only three months ago?

I will say that having three kids ages 5 and under is like inviting a tornado to take up residence in our house. Laundry, toys, dishes, noise. But when I hear Zack say to Cameron “You’re my bes fren” and when Cameron says to me “Mom, we love Eliana even more than we thought we would”, well, be still my soul. We are so blessed to have three beautiful children, and even more – they are so fortunate to have one another. Now if we could just move the tornado down to a nice spring rain…well, that would be nice too.

Our Elli Belly has finally decided to put her abs to work – and is sitting up nicely! Of course her belly reaches her knees, but I suppose once she starts crawling (maybe before she turns two?) some of that baby blubber will come off.

One of her top teeth is starting to come in, by itself, so her latest nickname is “Fang”. The hair is sprouting as well, and doing a good job at sticking straight up. We tried hair gel, but her skin was too sensitive for that. So Bed Head it is.

The boys continue to dote on their sister—entertaining her at home and protecting her in public. Spring has sprung so we are outside more often…enjoy the pictures!

Easter Reprise

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 04:00:00 GMT

There’s something about having three kids that makes journal writing fly right out the window. So much to say, so little time. I ‘spose I’ll just ramble a bit about this and that, until one of the munchkins is screaming, puking, or bleeding. Hopefully not all three at the same time.

Eliana has received her official citizenship papers from the White House. Included with the certificate was a letter “written by” and “signed by” George Bush himself. A keepsake indeed.
I’ve been looking back at Gotcha Day pictures and can’t believe what a Bald Wonder Eliana was. Her hair is coming in nicely now, a thick and shiny coat. Course, I have no idea how to comb little girls’ hair, so I just part it like I do for Cameron and Zack. I’ll have to remember on her first haircut not to say “keep the sideburns and just trim around the ears”. Poor Princess.
I brought home some jasmine tea leaves from China…and not nearly enough. I can smell the tea brewing, sip its sweet wonders, and be transported to China just like that.
Nathan has some kind of strange addiction to Chinese food. I have resorted to selling things on Ebay to support the habit. Please send any unwanted items to our home address so that he does not eat me out of house and home.
Eliana has learned to giggle…but she will only do this for the boys. Mom and Dad are a couple of Stiff Shirts to her.
Our Princess is just starting to sit up. Her Rotund Jelly Belly rests on the ground and helps her balance. Weeble Wobbles Wobble but they still fall down.

Below are some pictures of us on Easter. There are days when it feels like Eliana Haibo has been here forever, and days when I sure can’t figure out how she landed in this crazy family. Regardless, she is loved and doted on like never before.

The Girls:

Suitors, beware:

"Hello? I'll take one Kung Pow Chicken...to go."

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 05:00:00 GMT

(Nathan) It’s 8:00 PM. The grumblies in my tummy are ravaging even though I’ve eaten a huge dinner. But these grumblies are the silk-hatted, slanted-eyed variety who aren’t satisfied with mere American cuisine. “Must have Chinese food!” they yell, poking my innards with tiny chopsticks until I pick up the phone and order from the closest Chinese restaurant. This is getting to be a bad habit. Doesn’t help that the restaurant is right around the corner—and it has a drive through! How am I supposed to resist that?

THREE TIMES in the last five days I’ve done this!

Okay, so one time was to the other Chinese restaurant down the street. Maybe it shouldn’t count. They were going out of business and were GIVING FOOD AWAY FOR FREE. So naturally, being the gluttonous vulture that I am, I couldn’t resist the smell of good deal with a side of fried rice. (Actually, I gave them some money for the food. Couldn’t stand taking advantage of these poor people.)

With a 29” waist, I guess I can afford the extra calories, so I’m not too worried yet. But I was never like this before we went to China. In fact, I’ve scarcely eaten Chinese food before then. When I did, I didn’t even care for it that much.

Ahhh, but now it feeds not only my stomach, but my soul. There’s just something about a good Kung Pow or Szechuan Chicken that sends me right back to the restaurant in Guanzhou on the final night of our trip. I can hear the Chinglish chatter of the waitresses cooing over the baby girls in our group. I see the tired, happy faces of the parents who can’t believe they’ve made it to the other side of the world and are about to go back home, baby in tow. I smell the jasmine tea and sip it slowly as if to make the whole experience last just a little while longer. I feel the warmth of the cushy down comforter and pillows as I slip away to sleep one last night in a fairytale.

I thought China would drift away from memory by now. But it hasn’t, and I’m glad. China did more than change my tastebuds—it changed my heart. And I can’t wait to go back.

In the meantime, I guess I’ll have to read old journal posts and look at trip photos. And keep the carry-out menu right by the phone.

Gotcha Day Revisited

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Mon, 05 Mar 2007 05:00:00 GMT

A month has passed. One month since we walked into that cold, cold civil affairs office and stayed there for the whole afternoon (four hours) filling out paperwork. Once we stepped off the plane in Kunming that morning of February 5^th and felt the heat of the day, I promptly told Nathan that we’d be leaving our coats and fleece sweatshirts on the bus when we went in to meet Eliana. Yeah, smooth move, Ex Lax. It was like a meat locker in that place!

But there we all were, eight families (22 people before babies), two guides, and a couple of official notary people, all in a room that would have fit about two families comfortably. In the middle of the room was a big table, large enough to seat 8 adults, just waiting for us to scribble down whatever it was that our guides told us to write down (as none of us could think clearly due to Brain Freeze, both from the room temperature and baby brain).

I have yet to mention the Special Black Pens that we had to use for that day’s paperwork; here I am showing off Its Majesty:

And as you might remember, we were perched by the one and only window in the room, Nathan keeping an eagle eye out for The Baby Parade. The next thing we knew, in popped a nanny carrying a baby to our Sacred Paperwork Room and all was shot. I’ll never forget our guide, Sherry, making a big fuss (all in Chinese) to shoo the babies out of the room until we were good and ready for them to come in.

The whole event of receiving our babies was far more chaotic and less ceremonious than I would have liked. Sure, it is what I expected (after all, I’ve spent two years reading other people’s stories). In came a line of ladies carrying babies...

...and one by one, they quickly called out our baby’s Chinese name. Let me tell you, it is not that easy to recognize your child’s name when it is pronounced like it’s supposed to be pronounced! (as in, without the American twang) One second I hear our guide Sherry saying “Cheng Hai Bo” and the next second, a baby is handed off to me. Just like that! There were no tears from Hai Bo, Nathan, or me. I’ve cried enough tears over the past two years and at that point, it was just “Here’s my baby now let’s get down to the business of taking care of her and let’s finish up this paperwork so we can get back to the hotel and crank up the heat!”

If I remember correctly, there was only one baby (out of nine) who cried after the hand-off (Hi Mackenzie!). And her crying was minor, very minor. She settled down pretty quickly. Otherwise the babies were all very calm, Eliana included.

First thoughts. When I first held her and realized she couldn’t hold her head up, I immediately thought, “I’ve been handed a three-month old”. She was much tinier than we expected. Balder than expected. Small hands that loved to grasp our fingers. Stunning nails. Lovely eyes. Smallest baby in the room; developmentally the “youngest” baby in the room. She had the aroma of antibiotics, and her orphanage. I wish I could have packaged that smell up—it was so distinctly “China”…its food, the air, the water. But it escapes me now, and I miss it.

Cheng Hai Bo was wearing two pairs of pants, socks, shoes, a long-sleeve shirt, sweatshirt, and a thick coat on top of that. Other babies in the group had on similar outfits.

Soon we were handed a pack of medicine and hurriedly given instructions on how to administer. And of course we were given our first (of many) sermons on keeping those babies warm! It took a while for me to register—my baby has pneumonia, my baby has pneumonia. I just couldn’t believe it. It really isn’t all that unexpected for the babies to come with some kind of “cold”, but I wasn’t factoring in something like pneumonia. It wasn’t until our nurse friend Stephanie pointed it out to us that we noticed the little IV bruises on both of Eliana’s wrists and ankles. At some point we were also told of additional IVs that were needed and the trip(s) we’d be making to the orphanage clinic. It was not how I had pictured my Ideal Gotcha Day Baby, but as we now know, that silly respiratory infection was a gift from above.

We headed straight to the hotel from the civil affairs office, gathered our luggage, and began to make sense of how in the world we were going to do the ‘baby thing’ on the road. And while the Cobweb-Brained Parents were about that business, The Princess fell promptly asleep on our bed.

And that was Gotcha Day, 28 days ago. Since then, we have had a month of smiles, sparkling eyes, and speedy growth.

Eliana Haibo, we Gotcha. And we broughtcha home.

They Met Jesus in Guangzhou

lisa@stretchmarkmama.com — Mon, 05 Mar 2007 05:00:00 GMT

I have been looking for this picture for a few weeks now, and I found it! I found it! In our large travel group, there was a nice, witty, attractive young couple (like us) who had the fortune of meeting Jim Caviezel while they were walking around Shamian Island in Guangzhou (the last city we were all in). He was there adopting his second child from China, this time a five-year-old little girl. We never did run into “Jesus” ourselves, though we did keep our eyes wide open for a sighting.

Well, celebrity fans, eat your hearts out. Our claim to fame is that we were finalizing paperwork in China at the very same time as the One and Only Jim Caviezel.

Here are Robert, Jenny, and their daughter Jadyn (America World Travel Group 121) with Jim:

And if you want to read more of their story, go to www.journeytoalbania.com and click on “Meet Jadyn”.